A Wave of Emotions

And suddenly a curtain descends in front of your eyes. It traps your senses. Then a wave of emotions washes over you. Instinctively, you look around you. Everything appears like it was just a moment ago; nothing has changed even though you realize it is all so different now. What you see in front of you is nothing you want to embrace. So you walk away.

You feel an immense weight on your shoulders, slowing you down, holding you back. You sigh. You try to walk determined. There’s no more bounce in your step.

You take another sigh; and breathe in all the colors of life. When you open your eyes though, the colors wither away into hues of black and white. And you know beyond the shadow of a doubt, that you lost that sparkle in your eyes. There is no warmth in your smile anymore.

A small thought begins to form in your head. What is this. Why is this? Forget what, just why. Why now.Why again. You know you’ve been here before, it is all too familiar. There is no denying the déjà vu.
You become acutely aware of a new crack. Sadly, it’s a crack in your soul; it tugs at you in all the wrong places. You feel the void. You can’t escape the taste the bitterness even if you tried. It contains you.

Irony of ironies is how emptiness can hurt, how nothingness can cause you pain.

Why again you wonder.
But is this really something you want to know. Will knowing the reason why make it go away? That’s what our futile minds believe in spite of ourselves.

I’ll save you the journey this time. The why lies in the profound meaning of a 4 syllable word we refer to as disappointment.

Oft expectation fails and most oft there
Where most it promises, and oft it hits
Where hope is coldest and despair most fits. ~ William Shakespeare