Reflecting ...

Sitting here as 2008 comes to an end. A very highly anticipated end I must add. The chapter 2008 of our lives is finally closing, much to our great relief. It's like there is a universal agreement that this year will go down in history as one of the worst. I won't dwell on that. Everything has been said and done - in every scrutinizing way conceivable to man.

To sit and reminisce about the entire year. To mull over the past 365 days. Too many thoughts, too many incidents, and too many emotions. The setbacks, the difficulties and the breakthroughs. The dilemmas, the tragedies and the crises - personal, professional and global. To spice it up a little, add all the small - but remarkable nonetheless - victories, achievements and joys. Happy moments and moments of insane laugher as well. There is one thing I must admit about 2008: the year was definitely loaded, with more than its fair share of events!

2008 has been one hell of a year.

At this very moment, as I consciously sit and write about 2008 for me, I am feeling very reluctant. Why is December 31st the time to look back? The time to reflect. The time to make resolutions for the new year to come. As we kiss 2008 goodbye and welcome 2009 with arms cautiously wide open, why do we make lists of what we want to do and change and where we want to go (physically and metaphorically), knowing all too well that most of it will be dropped and forgotten by Valentine ?

What about decisions you've taken mid-way through the year and have meant something? What about revelations that do happen on a casual Sunday afternoon after a long day at work, after the battle with traffic and errands and the must-do and must-take phone calls? They are sometimes an eye-opener in every sense of the word.

I can ponder and I can contemplate. There is plenty to consider in 2008, but I find solace in a single reflection. Reflecting on the raging daemons that have surprisingly gone dormant, leaving behind a sense of calm. The feeling is almost surreal. Their noise is down to a whisper. Their shadows no longer block the sun and rain. Their toxic fumes won't cloud your judgment either. There is no 24/7 warp speed blur, just amazing exhilarating serenity.

I am fully aware they will wake up from this slumber, it's only the nature of their existence. That thought makes me smile. It's bizarre and disturbing, and what's even more alarming, I kind of know why. It is undeniably way too cliché. Way too cliché.

Come what may.

Disclaimer to any reader for feeling mushy, corny or nauseous right now. My most sincere apologies.

Growing Pains .. Pains Growing

We can't blame the signs this time. This one time, the entire universe is telling us something. Something supposedly magnificant. Endless signs announce its arrival. With bright lights, balloons, candles, lots of cheering, dancing and celebration. All the signs bring along a wonderful feeling of euphoria as well. At that one point though, we are totally unprepared. Clueless and oblivious to everything that lies ahead.

Today marks the day when you turn 18. I'm 18 and, I can drive.

WOOHOO.

We own the world in our hands. I had the world in my hands, sitting behind the steering wheel of my very first car. The excitement of it all. The thrill that you're 18. I got my driver's license even before I got my ID. I was 19 I think when I actually did. Don't ask.
Anyway, it is a big thing. It's huge, it's of massive proportions. It was before. It will be for just about every teenager, the dream of turning 18 and owning an official driver's license.
I know so many teens drive around way before that. Driving isn't the point. The point is you're 18. It's that one calendar day. No other birthday compares. Not a single one. 18 is one of a kind, unique from every angle. You have an official ticket to grown up land. The land of dreams. You feel you are invincible, and you realize the endless possibilities that lay in front of you. You're young, but not a kid. You're full of life, full of energy, and you're 100% sure you can do just about anything you set your mind up to. 'gonna be 18 till I die'. Bryan Adams said it all.

Cue in life.

Now it's your 21st birthday, you're not a minor anymore. 21. That's another major milestone. No longer a teenager, regardless of all the joy and pride of being a teen. This time it's even better. It's exhilirating. Being 21 is another story; and there is luster involved. You're 21. Your opinion counts. The little thoughts forming through your head; they can be voiced. You can make decisions. You've officially become an adult. It sounds very significant. An adult. You can do things on your own. You have a life of your own. You are in control. Done with education, got your degree, and you decide what you want to do. You believe in yourself, and in your dreams. Get a job, begin your professional career. Earn your own living. Make money for yourself. That first paycheck - unforgettable. You can purchase anything your heart desires. You totally rock your world.

Cue in life once again. This time it's stronger than the forces of nature. Life just happens. (no pun intended)

Somewhere along the line; we get taller and older, and realize that our taste in fashion, shoes, chocolate, coffee and so many other unimportant things has changed. We inevitably face the real world out there. We seek and explore. We stumble and fall. We try to paint with all the colors of the wind. We stand up. We stand tall. We kick our fears away. We win some, we lose some. We make believe. We hide behind masks. We follow our hearts. We defy our logic. We ignore those who don't agree with us. We live and learn.

We're growing, and we're expected to be responsible, mature and serious - in one other word, a grown up.
Do we grow up though?
Our thoughts, our troubles, our worries, our problems, they're actually still the same. Some of us are still hanging on to the same dreams.
You could argue that so much changes, nothing stays the same. Some dreams come true, some are abandoned, and new dreams are made. Problems grow, sometimes they intertwine and get more complicated, some problems get resolved, and new problems emerge. We forget what troubled us a few days ago. Nothing is the same.
You're right. Everything changes. Every single thing.Yet in a perplexing and very subtle way, it's still the same. The essence remains the same. There are traces of us in there, back then and right now. We were young. We were naive. Some of even foolish. Now we're older, but are we ever wiser?

We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations.” ~ Anais Nin

You Can Roar

"Chin up. Put your shoulders back, walk proud, strut a little. Don't lick your wounds: celebrate them. The scars you bear are the signs of a competitor. You're in a lion fight, Stevens. Just because you didn't win doesn't mean you don't know how to roar. " ~ Richard Weber, Grey's Anatomy

Once again Grey's Anatomy totally blows me away. I am overwhelmed.

The wisdom in the character's dialogue is extraordinary. It is full of amazing insight. I marvel at how beautiful the words are structured, the sentences are designed, and just how exquisite it is all put together. There is a brilliant world of meanings in what they say, think, imply, or even ridicule. I find that incredible.

It's simple everyday conversations that take place in a teaching hospital between doctors - about practicing medicine, saving lives, juggling with life and death decisions, staying ahead of the game, and being better surgeons. It vividly portrays the inner lives of these people, the demons they fight, their conflicts, their emotional roller coaster rides, their ambition, their greed, their desire and every other possible emotion or feeling or thought they experience.

Okai. Let's not get astray here, and praise the moon and the stars. It is an award-winning American series. It's complete fiction. There is an entire team of production and talented scriptwriters to create those characters, the themes of the episodes, the story lines, the medical cases and every single word they utter, including all the smart and witty comments.

What I appreciate though is beyond the drama. I was only able to realize the beauty in it all when I took the time to step back for a moment and look at the picture as a whole. The picture I saw is a labyrinthine journey of life, very elegantly painted. A picture we can all relate to in our own way, as completely different as it may be, and at widely varying levels. We find and learn something; of ourselves, our anecdote, our turmoil, our individual version of life.

And in my own story, the quote at the beginning is a brand new definition for perseverance; taking one more breath, struggling yet hanging on strong and determined to try again, facing everyone and everything as you standup one more time. You persevere ... knowing you can roar.

First Moment of Truth

First Moment of Truth is a concept invented by P&G.
"According to Proctor & Gamble shoppers make up their mind about a product in three to seven seconds, just the time it takes to note a product on a store shelf. FMOT is considered the most important marketing opportunity for a brand. "

The First Moment of Truth.
There's a certain look people get on their face, when their eyes widen as the 'truth' dawns on them. They go 'a ha', or 'aaaaaaaaaa'. In that exact moment, they get it. If life had animation, FMOT would most certainly be portrayed with a lightbulb going 'ting' above someone's head.

On a totally different note, from another perspective altogether, this quote below serves as a FMOT on its own. It's an eye-opener and it enlightens. You need to read between the lines.

"Ugh, you make me sick. Have some fire. Be unstoppable. Be a force of nature. Be better than anyone here, and don't give a damn what anyone thinks. There are no teams here, no buddies. You're on your own. Be on your own." ~ Christina Yang, Grey's Anatomy